How can this be happening? It’s the question many of us are asking as another story surfaces of a black man being murdered by white aggressors.

Racism is alive and well. It wasn’t abolished alongside slavery or with the civil rights movement. It doesn’t stay on the fringes or in secret meetings. It lives and breathes in the everyday systems and structures of our country. For many in the white community, this time particularly feels like a wake up call. It’s a moment of utter shock. And it should be. But for those in minority (especially black) communities, this is not a new phenomenon. Ask the families of Trayvon Martin, Tamir Rice, Sandra Brown, Eric Garner, Philando Castile, Michael Brown, Alton Sterling (and many others). And now, in just the last few weeks we can add Ahmaud Arbery and George Floyd to the list that no one wants to be on. The shock that we are feeling reveals that we have been unaware of realities that exist outside of our experience.

I don’t have the answers. I don’t know how we fix this. But I do know this – we have a responsibility to move beyond hashtags. We can’t just be shocked. We can’t just post our outrage. We must do more.

For me, that begins with educating ourselves. A number of years ago I realized I had a real gap in my knowledge when it came to issues of race. As a white man, race was an issue I had the luxury to ignore. The world I had known had always leaned in my direction. I was completely unaware of systemic racism. I had no idea about prisons for profit and mass incarceration and voter suppression. I didn’t know that bird watching was enough to make someone afraid enough to call the police. I didn’t know that black mothers and fathers have “the talk” with their children that has nothing to do with birds and bees, but rather with badges and batons.

But not knowing is not ok anymore. So let this moment move you. Let it anger you. Let it shock you. But please, let it change you. You and I have contributed to a system that allows this to happen. We are not innocent bystanders. We have been unaware long enough.

Below is a list of books I’ve read over the last few years. You don’t have to use my list, but please start to learn. Start to listen.

• The New Jim Crow – Michelle Alexander
• I’m Still Here – Austin Channing Brown
• The Very Good Gospel – Lisa Sharon Harper
• Between the World and Me – Ta-Nehisi Coates
• The Sun Does Shine – Anthony Ray Hinton
• Dream With Me – John Perkins
• Gracism – David Anderson

I grew up in a small community in southern CA. It was mostly white with a growing hispanic population as well. There were very few black families. I don’t know specific demographics, but if I had to guess I would put the number well south of 1% of our city.

Today I live in a city without a majority population. It’s roughly 45% white and 43% black with a collection of other ethnicities as well. I absolutely love it. I love that my daily interactions in the world are always going to include people different than me.

That being said, I’m fairly ignorant when it comes to Black History. It wasn’t exactly a topic we spent a lot of time on in my city growing up. In fact, there were very few voices in my life from people of color at all (if any?). So one of my goals the last couple of years has been to really grow in this area of my life and one of the best ways I know to do that is through reading. So here’s some of the authors I’ve been reading the last couple of years. I’d encourage you to check some of these out!

• Rod Hairston – Cover Her (Rod’s a friend, a pastor and a real mentor to me)
• Derwin Gray – HD Leader (former NFL player turned pastor)
• Archbishop Desmond Tutu – The Book of Joy (the funniest Archbishop you’ll ever read)
• Lisa Sharon Harper – The Very Good Gospel (holy smokes. Incredible.)
• John Perkins – Dream With Me (a legend in the civil rights movement)
• Tony Dungy – Uncommon Marriage (NFL guy, commentator with an incredible ministry to dads)
• Michelle Alexander – The New Jim Crow (One of the most important books in the world right now, in my opinion)

These are just a few random things that have become a part of my life and have helped me, so I thought I’d share them with you:

1. Slack – This is an app that runs my work life communication. I can’t imagine doing what I do without it now. It has virtually eliminated email between me and my team. It’s where we share ideas, plan things together and touch base on everything from the major to the minor. We can share documents, links, photos and more.

2. A treadmill – It was this time last year that we made the big purchase. Every once in a while I’ll still go outside and run but then I remember why a treadmill is so nice. Mainly, I don’t hurt as bad. My joints and my feet thank me. I get to watch Netflix to forget that I’m running, and I get to dress the same every time – no special arctic running gear necessary. I don’t run for the joy of it like some crazy people, I run to be healthy. So anything I can do to turn a discipline into something more enjoyable is worth it to me.

3. VidAngel – Well, this app is currently not available because of some legal issues. But if it ever comes back, it’s something you should know about. It allowed us to “rent” movies via streaming for $1 each. Before watching users got the chance to filter anything they wanted to filter out of the movie. It really helped to be able to feel good about what I was showing my kids, but I appreciated the filtering option for me as well.

4. The 5 year journal – I heard about the idea of a 5 year journal on a podcast. I’ve never been able to keep the habit of journaling, mostly because I felt this pressure to write a lot. This journal has a few lines per entry. It’s a place to capture a quick thought about the day, about something I learned, a prayer, etc. I’ve found that writing in it at the end of a day works best for me. I still don’t do it every day, but it’s more than ever. And the cool thing is that you keep using the same journal for five years, so at some point I’ll start seeing past entries and what was happening in prior years on that same day. Pretty cool. (The one I purchased is by Levenger and is linked above.)

5. Podcasts – I know, it’s not anything new. But I don’t know that I understand people who don’t use these as a primary way of learning and growth. Last year I added a few that were more storytelling than anything else. I binged my way through Serial, as well as Revisionist History. But my regulars include the Relevant podcast, the Andy Stanley Leadership podcast, the Craig Groeschel Leadership podcast, The Matt Keller Leadership Channel.

Time to dust off the blog. This is my annual list of the books I read and a little commentary on some of the highlights.

1.  Jesus’ Son – Johnson
2. Our Story Begins – Wolff
3. The Heroic Path – Sowers
4. Defining Moments – Heath (not yet published)
5. How to be Here – Bell
6. The most excellent way to lead – Noble
7. The Divine Conspiracy – Willard (re-read)
8. Girl at the end of the world – Esther
9. The Five Dysfunctions of a Team – Lencioni (re-read)
10. The Emotionally Healthy Leader – Scazzero
11. The Ideal Team Player – Lencioni
12. Band of Brothers – Ambrose
13. Addicted to Busy – Bloye
14. The Customer Service Revolution – DiJulius
15. I don’t care if we never get back – Blatt & Brewster
16. Intentional Living – Maxwell
17. Emotionally Healthy Spirituality – Scazzero
18. The Very Good Gospel – Harper
19. Rooted – Liebscher
20. Crucial Conversations – Patterson, etc.
21. The New Jim Crow – Alexander
22. The Bible Tells Me So… – Enns
23. The Pastor – Peterson
24. When your father dies – Veerman and Barton
25. Extreme Ownership – Willink and Babin

So many good reads here. (Speaking of goodreads, see below if you want to connect there.) The theme of the year seems to be going deeper inside myself. I read a lot about emotional health (Scazzero books), about healthy rhythms and rest (Intentional Living, Addicted to Busy, How to be Here), and about calling and purpose (Rooted, The Pastor, The Heroic Path) and ultimately about grief and understanding loss (When Your Father Dies).

I love to read leadership books and this year was no exception. Probably my favorite in that department was a less traditional leadership book – Band of Brothers. I had finally watched the show by the same name this year on Netflix and so reading the book was me wanting more. I gleaned so much from the real life examples of this incredible group of men.

I tried to be intentional this year in learning and growing in my understanding of injustice. I’ve only just begun that journey but I was so moved by The New Jim Crow and The Very Good Gospel. The first was an incredibly eye-opening journey into inequality and injustice in current day America and the second was a more theological journey. Both have left a lasting impression on me.

I think my favorite book I read this year was “The Pastor.” It was written by Eugene Peterson (The Message translation author). It’s a memoir of his life and calling and the ways he wrestled with the role God gave him as a pastor. It’s packed full of wisdom from a man who has done this a very long time. I’m deeply grateful for his wisdom and insight and will come back to it a lot I’m sure.

So there’s the list. What would you recommend I put on my list for 2017?

**Connect with me on GoodReads here.